I recently celebrated my 47th birthday. Around the time of my birthday, I always pause to reflect on the things I’ve done or wanted to do over the last year. The biggest one that stood out for me this year was completing a half marathon. Beforehand, if you asked me if I could do it, I would’ve said probably not.
A 10-kilometre race in Ottawa
It all started in December 2023, when my daughter Anne told me she was going to run the 10-kilometre race with me. She was going to come from Fredericton, to be by my side to race at the Tamarack Ottawa Race Weekend. I’d registered alone. Now I was motivated and excited.
The race took place in May 2024. My goal was to complete the race, even if I had to crawl across the finish line. There was no time limit. I would be fine. And I did complete it, in just under one hour and 30 minutes. I found it challenging, I enjoyed the energy vibe and my family was waiting for me when I was done.
A few weeks after we completed the 10-kilometre race, Anne mentioned that she was going to do the half marathon in Fredericton, a full 21.1-kilometre race, with a couple of co-workers. I wasn’t sure if she was serious, but she said I should think about joining them. There were a lot of logistics involved, including taking time off work, buying plane tickets, registration and then the entire training itself throughout the hot summer.
Training for the half marathon
I briefly thought about it and decided to go for it. My dream had always been to do a 10-kilometre race, but a half marathon never even occurred to me. However, I took this as an opportunity. My daughter would be in the race and we’d spend time together. I started hatching out my training plan immediately.
A couple weeks into my training schedule, I wanted to give up. I worked 12-hour shifts on the weekends and didn’t drive. There was no way I could get any running in on Saturdays or Sundays. So that left me with five days, Monday to Friday, to get all three training runs in. I needed a shorter one, a medium one and then a longer run. I’d keep increasing each as the weeks went by.
On the days I ran my farthest, I was toast. I wasn’t able to do anything else except exist. I was still hanging in there, though, until I found out there might be a cut-off time for the race. This was news to me, because for the other race I’d completed, there had been no time limit. I checked, and sure enough, all racers had to finish within three hours and 30 minutes.
I panicked. It was over for me. I was a slow runner. A couple of days before I flew out for the race, I completed the longest run I’d finished up to that date. I ran 19 kilometres in three hours and 22 minutes, but I wanted to cry. I had no idea how I was going to be able to run another 2.1 kilometres in only eight minutes.
The 2024 Fredericton Fall Classic
There was no turning back, so I flew out to participate in the 2024 Fredericton Fall Classic. It wasn’t until we picked up our bibs and shirts that it felt real. I remember that as I touched my shirt, shivers went down both my arms.
I kept repeating positive affirmations. I reminded myself that I’d made it this far. Even if I didn’t finish the rest, I’d tried. I was worried about embarrassing my daughter, but the time for doubt and second-guessing was over, and it was time to gear up for the race.
I was worried about embarrassing my daughter, but the time for doubt and second-guessing was over, and it was time to gear up for the race.
The minute the gun went off, I panicked. I started running, but there were so many people that I had to focus on moving forward one step at a time. I only saw my daughter for a couple of minutes, and then she was in the thick of the crowd.
The first few kilometres went by OK. The weather was good. Not too hot, not too cold. It wasn’t raining. It was beautiful fall weather. By 8 kilometres in, I was still repeating positive affirmations and motivating myself. When I saw the marker for 13 kilometres, I was doing OK, but I was spending too much time watching the clock. By marker 16, I felt like I wasn’t in that great of shape overall. People were cheering and giving me high-fives, but I was honestly starting to doubt that I had another 5 kilometres left in me to continue.
The timing couldn’t have been more perfect, though, as my daughter Anne ran past me while going in the opposite direction. She cheered me on. She was about to finish the last leg of the marathon. Seeing her smile and her words of encouragement gave me the motivation I needed to push forward.
I kept going until I hit marker 19, and then I stopped for a few minutes in confusion. There were two ways to go. If I went the wrong way, not only would I not complete the race, but I’d be lost. Luckily, just then, one of the volunteers was coming by to start closing up the water station. I knew I was running out of time.
The volunteer pointed me in the right direction and told me to focus on positive affirmations and run. That was it. It was simple, keep moving forward, so I did.
In my mind, it seemed to take forever, but there it was: marker 20. I had another 1.1 kilometres to go, and then I could check half marathon runner off my list. As I was about to turn a corner, I heard a strange noise, but I kept pushing forward. There was a woman volunteer who was cheering as she jumped up and down; she told me to keep going, I had this, I was going to make it.
I almost stopped in surprise. It wasn’t over. I was still good for time. There was a chance. For that entire last kilometre, there were amazing volunteers filled with energy pumping me up. I absorbed as much as I could. I kept running, albeit slowly because I was nearly empty.
The finish
Finally, I came around the corner and I heard the announcer yell my name. I turned to my left and saw that the bleachers were completely empty, except for two wonderful people. I spotted my son-in-law first because he was so tall. Standing beside him was my daughter Anne, jumping up and cheering for me.
As I crossed the finish line, the medal was placed around my neck. Anne hugged me, yelling “You did it, you did it!” My race time was 3:18:18 and I came in second-last. None of that mattered. I’d done what I’d thought would be impossible.
After the race, all I could remember is scarfing down the hot dog my son-in-law Callum picked up for us and wanting to cry because I felt so happy. In fact, I was so overwhelmed with emotion, I couldn’t even reply to the messages that were waiting for me. I’d been keeping my partner David, as well as my friends and family, updated until the race had started. Everyone wanted to know if I’d made it.
A reminder that I can do hard things
Back at Anne’s, I took a two-hour nap to breathe and let all the sunshine and good feelings soak into my entire body. Afterward, I called David to tell him the good news and replied to the messages that were waiting. The medal is pinned up in my office as a reminder that I can do hard things!
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image 1: ianhun2009; image 2: Anne-Marie Miller