I\u2019ll see if I can help unpack this essential topic, although it\u2019s very difficult and I\u2019m not sure I\u2019ll do a good job. But then again, the Buddha himself was unsure he could do a good job. <\/p>\n
After attaining enlightenment under the Bodhi Tree in India, a state of nirvana where he\u2019d no longer ever experience unhappiness, he remained silent for seven weeks. He felt there was no way he could communicate this state of ultimate satisfaction to others. They just wouldn\u2019t get it. <\/p>\n
Finally, after being convinced by both celestial beings and human beings that he should teach what he\u2019d discovered, he relented. And isn\u2019t it interesting that his very first teaching was on the nature of suffering: that all beings are oppressed and not free. They aren\u2019t liberated, rather they\u2019re imprisoned by various afflictions and mental disorders, and they don\u2019t even know it!<\/p>\n
In my early days of being immersed in the Buddhist tradition, I wondered why he didn\u2019t start with the third noble truth, the release from suffering\u2014which is the state of ultimate peace and satisfaction, nirvana\u2014rather than starting with suffering itself. This certainly would make for an easier, prepackaged sell in the modern Western world! <\/p>\n
Over the years, as I\u2019ve considered this, I\u2019ve come to understand that the Buddha made great effort to educate us about suffering first because if we don\u2019t know what suffering really is, then, we can assume, our idea of happiness would be similarly skewed.<\/p>\n
Is unpleasantness our default state? <\/h2>\n
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It\u2019s strange to think that we don\u2019t know what happiness is when, fundamentally, all we\u2019re doing is seeking some sort of experience to feel better. This in itself gives us a clue into what is meant by suffering, and especially into its all-pervasiveness. For if we\u2019re always seeking to feel better or seeking to maintain the good feeling we have or trying to avoid an unpleasant experience, then, logically speaking, we aren\u2019t secure in our happiness. <\/p>\n
In fact, we\u2019re in a constant state of dis-ease. Our \u201chappiness\u201d is always in danger of evaporating in the very next moment. And further, what we\u2019re calling happiness, when further analyzed, tends to be equated with a feeling of pleasure or pleasantness.<\/p>\n
This kind of tentativeness around our feelings and positive experiences clearly implies that we\u2019re constantly on shaky ground\u2014merely trying to stave off the next unpleasant experience or prolong a pleasant one. This is a big part of what is meant by the Buddhist notion of suffering: We aren\u2019t relaxed in our own skin or in our own mind, as a baseline.<\/p>\n When our contentment, good feelings, happiness and satisfaction are by nature fleeting, then is that real happiness?<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<\/figure>\n When our contentment, good feelings, happiness and satisfaction are by nature fleeting, then is that real happiness? <\/p>\n Bouncing around from one good feeling to the next isn\u2019t the Buddhist idea of happiness or contentment. That is a constant sense of anxiety that demands we stay vigilant about keeping the feel-good experience happening and avoiding the loss of it. The loss of that feel-good experience is a state that isn\u2019t pleasant, yet that really is our baseline. <\/p>\n If this is the case\u2014that we have to constantly keep moving towards pleasure to avoid the unpleasant\u2014then we can say our general state of being is unpleasantness. This unpleasantness may be just below the surface, but the point remains. We can\u2019t claim to be happy when we\u2019re constantly trying to seek or maintain a feeling of contentment and well-being.<\/p>\n One could argue, if our unhappiness lies below the surface even as it\u2019s directing our moment-to-moment thoughts, feelings and activities, \u201cBut isn\u2019t ignorance bliss?\u201d This \u201cignorance is bliss\u201d argument is a bit like thinking that since dogs love dog food, then we should all just remain ignorant and settle for dog food, too. <\/p>\n From the Buddhist practitioner\u2019s point of view, having seen the potential for great joy and happiness, mundane pleasures appear like dog food. Most of us have eaten great meals; we\u2019d never give up those fortunate dining experiences to settle for dog food. <\/p>\n By the same token, neither would the spiritual person settle for mundane, ephemeral, fleeting pleasures in exchange for the state of liberation from all mental anguish, afflictions and disorders. If you can have filet mignon<\/em>, why eat a can of Alpo?<\/p>\n Yet we resist coming to the realization that things in life are actually difficult, painful and dissatisfying and that our pursuit to numb this through pleasures seems, well, pretty unreal. For example, you may have noticed that you can\u2019t stay in one place for very long. You get hungry, so you sit down for a meal and then you need to get up when you\u2019re finished. You may go to the couch to watch TV, but after a while get tired and go to bed. <\/p>\n If you found happiness in bed, then why do you get up in the morning? If your job made you happy, then why not stay at work all the time? If taking a vacation were true happiness, what would it be like if you stayed on holiday all the time?<\/p>\n I knew people who thought that being on holiday was the key to happiness. They made enough money so that they could go on a cruise every year. First they went for a month. Then three months. Then six months. Yet they were no happier than anyone else. When they were on the ship, they\u2019d complain that the quality of the food had deteriorated, the entertainment consisted of the same old shows and they\u2019d been to most of the ports of call so they wouldn\u2019t go ashore.<\/p>\n They contemplated switching alliances to another cruise line as they heard the other line had more interesting ports and more restaurants. But then they found out the ship was too large with too many passengers\u2014less intimate. Where does the search for happiness end? <\/p>\n This is what the Buddha was trying to tell us when he said we are in the nature of suffering. Suffering isn\u2019t the cruise line. Suffering is in the mind.<\/p>\n This is of course a depressing thought when there is nothing to replace this difficult situation. If we try to find a suitable antidote for suffering, we find that the opposite of that concept isn\u2019t exactly happiness, although happiness is a byproduct. <\/p>\n The absence of suffering means there is wisdom\u2014the wisdom of knowing how things exist and how we exist as well. In that state of wisdom, everything appears as soft, gentle, non-threatening, peaceful and clear. <\/p>\n The byproduct of this is we are possessed by a mind that is so balanced and unagitated that the natural effect is happiness, but a happiness that is unusual in the sense that we don\u2019t ever experience it, because it is non-diminishing\u2014it doesn\u2019t fade or morph into some new agitated, unfulfilled state of mind.<\/p>\n Thus, the actual opposite of suffering is awakening. This distinction in Buddhist thought is highly relevant. Awakening, or awakened buddhahood, is the ultimate state of happiness, which never diminishes.<\/p>\n Karuna Cayton is the author of 6 Myths We Live By: And How to Overcome Them<\/em><\/strong> and The Misleading Mind: How We Create Our Own Problems and How Buddhist Psychology Can Help Us Solve Them<\/em><\/strong>. For more than 50 years, he has studied and practiced Buddhism, dedicating his life to translating its profound psychological insights into practical tools for modern life. Visit him online at www.karunacayton.com.<\/p>\n Excerpted from 6 Myths We Live By: And How to Overcome Them by Karuna Cayton<\/em><\/strong>. \u00a9 2025 Wisdom Publications. Reprinted with permission of Wisdom Publications, Inc.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n images: Depositphotos<\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I\u2019ll see if I can help unpack this essential topic, although it\u2019s very difficult and I\u2019m not sure I\u2019ll do<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":18159,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[19],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-18158","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-inspiration"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/shop-cili.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18158","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/shop-cili.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/shop-cili.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/shop-cili.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/shop-cili.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=18158"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/shop-cili.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18158\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/shop-cili.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/18159"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/shop-cili.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=18158"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/shop-cili.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=18158"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/shop-cili.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=18158"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}\n
But\u2014isn\u2019t ignorance bliss? <\/h2>\n
\nWhere does the search for happiness end? <\/h2>\n
\nAwakened buddhahood vs. suffering<\/h2>\n
\n![\"Front](\"https:\/\/www.themindfulword.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/cover-six-myths-cayton.jpg\" "\\"HAPPINESS")
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